Chapter 9
#Lily’s POV#
I wept bitterly attempting to cry out all my pain, but every time I tried doing that I realise the pain is infinite so as the anguish and heavy agony that makes my life seem like a burden to me. The grief and sorrow I felt was more than that hidden at the furthest end of love.
“I’ve had enough”I said as I wiped my tears with the back of my hand.
“I know it’s heartbreaking to you as a mother to watch this footage. It seems you’re going through a painful phase right now and I’m sorry”the head teacher said.
No, don’t be. I’ve been through that phase all my life.
I tried to chuckle but what came out was a lame choke that made another tear fall.
She resumed, “But, we’d have to expel your daughter. Royal heights is a top notch school and this is such a painful slap on the authorities’ face. A disdain. It could taint our reputation to keep such a child in this school. We’re sorry”
“It’s fine. May I take my leave now”my voice broke.
“Yes, but I wouldn’t recommend you taking her to another school. I’d rather you keep her home for as long as it needs to get rid that lesbianism. when you do so, you can bring her back here or decide to take her somewhere else. You’re the mother, the decision is yours”
“Thanks for the advise. Goodbye”I said as I rose and grabbed Abi before leaving.
I asked myself ‘when will this sorrow vanish and stop clinging to my life? Must I resort to committing suicide but then what will happen to my kids? Leo will leave them. How will they live like normal children? I don’t want my kids to end up like me in the orphanage and end up having a sad story like mine. I hope this sorrow will be over soon’
Though I knew it was infinite 🫀🩸
I knew I’d never have a normal life and if I did, will I even live like a normal human? I was used to being hurt so I’ll just keep living like a freak. But I don’t want this sorrow to stay.
I don’t even have any happy memory I could look back at and smile. My wedding day seemed like the happiest thing that ever happened to me but little did I know that it was just the beginning of my misery.
How do I go about my life?
how do I go about this sadness?
where do I begin? Will I suddenly die one day without having a happy memory and leave my kids behind with the left overs of my misery. Is it then Leo would finally jolt back into his normal self? will he cater for my kids, his kids?
Will I be happy in heaven? or would I go to hell and rot for not living a good life? I don’t remember that being a sin though I knew I would get something worse than hell. what really is my life? who does it matter to? who really cares about it?
